Conspiracy of Dunces
The plan seemed foolproof: To avoid having Clayton Daniels go to jail relating to a sexual assault charge, he and his wife, Molly, plotted to dig up a body, burn it in a car crash and pretend it was him. Then Molly would pocket the $110,000 in life insurance-and Clayton would return to his family under a new identity.
Not surprisingly, the plan went awry. Investigators noticed that there were no skid marks at the crash site, and the car was not damaged the way it might have been in such an accident. And then there was the matter of Molly's "new boyfriend."
Soon after the strawberry blond Clayton supposedly died in the crash, Molly introduced her young son Caleb to a dark-haired guy named Jake. "There's Daddy!" Caleb exclaimed upon seeing the man who looked just like his stepfather. Molly quickly corrected him. "No, Daddy is in heaven," she said. "That's Jake." But a little dye-and beard, sunglasses and baseball cap "Jake" always wore-didn't fool Caleb. Nor did it fool the Texas Rangers.
Six months after the crash, DNA evidence showed the person in the car wasn't Clayton; it was the body of 81-year-old Charlotte Davis. By then, however, investigators had been tipped off about the mysterious Jake. Cops arrested Clayton and Molly at a Taco Bell on Dec. 3.
In May Molly, 22, plead guilty to insurance fraud and hindering her husband's apprehension. She was sentenced to 20 years and a $10,000 fine. Clayton, 24, had his probation revoked and received a 20-year sentence. He still faces charges for arson and insurance fraud. Caleb is living with Molly's mom. Says the couple's former neighbor Julie Regier: "I just don't think they had the wits to get away with it."
Carjacker Photo Finished
Darting into the tiny Pembroke, N.C., post office to pick up her mail on May 18, second-grade teacher Lucy Hunt didn't expect a problem leaving her 5-year-old granddaughter asleep in the back seat. Then she bumped into the parent of one of her students, who briefly blocked her view. Next thing she knew, her Jeep Grand Cherokee was pulling out-with Bethany still inside.
While Hunt was reporting the incident to police, a liquor store called to say that a little girl had been dropped off. "It was only about 10 minutes," says Hunt, 48, who was quickly reunited with the unharmed child, "but it seemed a lot longer."
When police recovered Hunt's car, her camera was still inside. And when Hunt got back the prints, there was a bigger surprise: photos of the apparent joyrider at the wheel, taken by a friend he later picked up. What's more, Hunt recognized the alleged carjacker-28-year-old Shawn Lee Jones-as a former student. He was quickly arrested. "I'm kind of surprised," says Pembroke Police Chief Royal Travis Bryant of Jones, who is being held on $45,000 bail pending a June 24 court date. "People don't usually give themselves away like that."
Guilty of Attempted Hookup?
On Jan. 19 New Castle County, Del., police say three young men ordered two pepperoni pizzas from Domino's Pizza, but when the 18-year-old delivery woman arrived, the trio stole the pizza along with $20. A few minutes later, police say, one of them, Brent Brown, 25, called the woman back to ask her out.
"He says, 'I'm sorry that I robbed you. You're pretty,'" says Police Chief David McAllister. She politely declined but turned over his cell number to the cops. Brown, who says he's innocent, goes to trial Sept. 9. Of the alleged hookup attempt, McAllister says, "I suppose he doesn't believe first impressions last forever."
Confessing to the IRS - On Air
In May 2002 Lee "Crazy Cabbie" Mroszak, a regular on Howard Stern's radio program, bragged that he didn't pay taxes. Bad move. An IRS agent reported the comment. The IRS found Mroszak hadn't paid up in three years. He plead guilty to tax evasion and in May was sentenced to a year in prison. "Crazy Cabbie made [prosecuting] real easy," says an IRS spokesman.
Car Thief Loses Car - and Wallet?
A few hours after Gregory Alston told Baltimore police that his 1998 Nissan Maxima was missing, the car's real owner, Michael Wilson, arrived at the station. Alston, it turned out, had allegedly carjacked the vehicle two weeks earlier, only to lose it after Wilson's girlfriend spotted it and called police. They towed it-with Alston's wallet inside. Alston goes to trial July 1 for armed robbery and use of a weapon with intent to injure. His wallet is still being held as evidence.
Smile for the Camera
There's more money hidden in the ceiling, the Chicago gas-station clerk told alleged robber Matthew White in February. So White looked up-straight into the surveillance camera. He was charged with robbery and is awaiting trail.
Down in Flames
"I think your purse is on fire," the Burleson, Texas, bank teller told Sharon Ann Luck as she approached. But that eye-catching crimson the teller spotted wasn't flames-it was a dye pack that had exploded when Luck entered the branch; the more than $1,600 she was trying to deposit she had stolen earlier that day from another bank.
Stupidity Defense
Guy walks into a bank, deposits $160-then shows the teller a gun-shaped object in his pocket and walks away $3,000 richer. At least that's what prosecutors claim Abraham Aessa, 24, did. However, at his trial last June, Aessa argued, unsuccessfully, that he couldn't have committed the robbery-because no one could be that dumb.
Robbed His Own Bank
Thomas Dorsey seemed oddly familiar with the Southington, Conn., bank he robbed of $1,200 last year. For good reason: It was his own branch-and he wasn't disguised. Dorsey, who was sentenced to 21 years, told cops who arrested him that he should appear in a list of America's Dumbest Criminals.
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